The ultimate end of my life!

I have recently been asked to talk about the ultimate end of my life. I have to admit that it is kind of difficult for me to say anything about it. Whether I am too young still to think about that or whether I do not have a clue, I don't know. I have to be honest and say that not long ago still I was wondering what I was going to do this year so obviously I was not thinking further than that. The first thing that comes to my mind when thinking of the ultimate end of life is death and truth be told I do not really fancy talking about that. I guess that if I should really say something and face the question I'd say that I wish to feel accomplished. I do not know if this means much but what I mean is that I wish not having any regrets and when time comes to an end I'd feel satisfied with my past. How could I get there? This is an other interesting question. Knowing that we just live once and assuming that the ultimate end is death I would like to do everything I like and try everything I fancy doing. Nevertheless, everything we do has consequences and would I really like to do something good that could, in a future, causes me problems. Let's say I fancy being rich right now, am I going to rob a bank? Even if luckily I could get off of it without any problems that would mean leaving the country and never see my family again or things like that, well it's crazy.

To be satisfied eventually I should gradually make my future. Let's talk about something closer to the present. Right now I'm an economic student which I wasn't one month ago. I made a progress or maybe not. Eventually I could like the career and find my way but maybe I realize that once again I mistaken what I wished and so wasted my time.

It is really complicated to answer what is my ultimate end. Who knows? No one can plans what their lives will be like, no one can know what's coming up. Obviously you can have dreams, you can follow them but one day it can crashes and then what? Life is unexpecting. Tomorrow is an other day wish can be totally different from today or even yesterday. I guess I prefer not think about what will my ultimate end be and live my life as it goes without worrying if it is taking a different path than the one I planned.

I know that whatever happens I will regret things I did or did not do and also be satisfied with others, this is, I strongly think, normal. All I can do for now is being optimist and hope for the best but nonetheless be crushed if something wrong comes up.

What I might do when I get to the ultimate end of my life is thinking of what I did to get there and then I might be able to write something more explicit.  

Departure

I do not seem to motivate myself to get the suitcases done, nor am I motivated to just get dressed. Tomorrow at this time, I'll be (should be) ready to leave home direction Paris to get my flight but for a reason I ignore I'm not really looking forward to it. I guess I am just scared of changes, AGAIN.
Three years ago, at this time I was at uni studying languages and economics, but apart from the students parties I didn't enjoy much the classes. I left France and took my gap year in London, but my supposed one year of freedom became at last three years...which is long. I enjoyed it most of the time but was totally lost (still am). I miss studying and obvisouly in this world we all need a career to get somewhere. I doubt that my A level degree (baccalauréat in France) gets me somewhere so I do need to get at least one grade (4years studying)... Makes me lazy. First of all, I am not even sure to get to uni again. I asked for the universities of Madrid but before the 14th of this month I won't know if I do get in, or not, which is quite stressful.
I don't know why the government of any country do not help young student to find their way. What I mean is, I had to choose what I wanted to do with my life two years before even passing the bachelor which means that we are asked (at least in France) to choose our life at 15 years old which is pretty young let's admit it.
Anyway, if you are like me, confuse about everything and clueless well you just get lost!
Now that I believe that I know what to do, no one is helping me to do it. There is no financial support from the government nor I had the possibility to receive advice from anyone whose jobs suppose to indicate more or less what you are good at.

Nevermind, I am going to Madrid tomorrow, will spend a week looking for I don't know what and then on the 14th it will be the beginning, whether of my life or of my lost... Let's hope it will be the first one!